How do I get rid of this mind set?

First off, there are many people who feel just like you. You are isolated...maybe, but not alone. It sounds like you are judging your life by what you don't have, not by what you do have. As far as being hideous, I know its hard to believe but you don't have to be hot to be attractive or have a good life. Articulation takes practice. Many of the most famous artist died feeling the same way you do, reaching success and acclaim only after dying in a life of poverty, but they were committed to the end. Society is glad they were. Write, draw, and film according to your own convictions and pions. Maybe then our society can get back to real art. The greatest artist were not understood they were controversial and at times outcasts. Many made us feel uncomfortable and forced us to see ourselves in a way we never wanted to. Some captivate us, others inspire us, but it is all through the eyes and perception of the artist. Stop comparing yourselves to others or you can never be more than they are. You say you are hideous, but you are really just seeing beauty the way it has been spoon fed to you. Have the guts to think outside the box. Write, paint, film what comes to mind and you will develop as an artist, instead of a copy cat. Artist can do their best work lonely and depressed because these are important human emotions. Start with a video diary, ask other lonely and depressed people to film for you. Dig into what you are feeling, and create something real. there is some pint up person waiting to know how they feel through you art. They will not know the emotion until an artist is willing to expose it to them throught their eyes. "anything interesting will just turn out to be a tease and nothing more" sounds like art waiting to be created to me.